The phrase “gridlock” has
been used a lot over the past few years to imply that political differences in
the government in Washington are impeding “legislative progress”, a phrase that
itself may be an oxymoron. Depending on
where you went to school an “oxymoron”is either a really dumb cow-like animal with
big horns or a self-contradictory phrase, both seem to be common in the nation’s
capital. But either way, “gridlock” may
be getting a bad rap.
First of all,
“gridlock” comes from the description of a traffic jam, like the ones caused by
fourteen year old girls driving their friends to a Justin Beiber concert and
being so excited that they pull into busy intersections and stop. Of course fourteen year old girls shouldn’t
be driving, but Justin Beiber shouldn’t be singing, so in a philosophical sense
maybe the two balance out. In any case
“gridlock” in Washington isn’t all that bad because it creates a “firewall”
against incompetent political leadership. Firewalls are what keep
fraternity houses from completely burning down on Saturday nights and the
political version has had a similar positive effect over the
last six years.
Even so, “gridlock” hasn’t always worked. The biggest example is ObamaCare which snuck
through Congress before the grid was locked.
ObamaCare has never been popular but still, Obama’s supporters, started
calling it his “flagship” accomplishment.
“Flagship” is a naval term like “happy hour” and “political
correctness”, and denotes something of great importance. But when Obama’s supporters on the Left received a letter from
eight Gender Studies majors at Brown University, complaining that “flagship” had something
to do with the “military-industrial complex” they started calling ObamaCare his
“signature” accomplishment. It’s a
“signature accomplishment” because he had a big ceremony in which he “signed”
it. Ordinary people can tell when Obama
is having a “signature moment” because he shows up all day on CNN sitting at a desk surrounded by
little black kids, signing a piece of
paper with a basket full of pens; one for each letter of his name and any
doodles he might want to add just
for fun. Occasionally, Nancy Pelosi is
standing behind him with her vacant stare and quixotic smile to add enthusiasm to the moment.
The little black kids don’t
get these pens because they are valuable
for Democrat fund raisers. Obama’s fund
raisers happen each Wednesday in Beverly Hills,
California. For thirty-five thousand dollars,
rich Hollywood liberals will find a “signature pen” between their“non-GMO” tofu and their “organic” Chardonnay
while they listen to Obama talk about the evils of financial inequality.
But back to gridlock. Gridlock
happens in Washington when Fox News has a majority in one house of Congress and
the New York Times has a majority in the
other. In the new Congress that takes over in January, Fox will have majorities
in both houses but the New York Times will still control the
White House, so grid lock will still be the way legislative business doesn’t
get done.
The list of important
issues that qualify for gridlock is long.
There is tax reform, infrastructure rebuilding, immigration, Guantanamo
detainees, the Keystone
pipeline and of course Obama’s “signature issue” ObamaCare. Republicans want to
change ObamaCare but whenever the word
“ObamaCare” is uttered in the halls of Congress, Texas Republican Senator Ted
Cruz pops up like the AFLAC Duck and starts quacking about
repeal of the whole program. This strategy
is a perfect candidate for gridlock. If
Cruz actually got a repeal bill introduced in the Senate it would be
filibustered to death by the Democrat minority.
Even if the Democrats were all away that day for election defeat group
counseling and it passed, Obama would veto it. So what to do? Republicans not from Texas want to chip away at various onerous
provisions of ObamaCare like grief therapy for people who start to miss their
favorite body parts after sex change operations (Sec. 2146 B.),
or higher subsidies for the poor for emergency aroma therapy (Sec.3756 D.) To
make these changes they would add amendments to important bills that the
President won’t want to veto. He’ll veto
them anyway but at least gridlock will then be seen as his fault (except by the
New York Times).
Another issue that seems
ripe for gridlock is the Keystone pipeline which would bring a bazillion and a
half barrels of oil from Canada to refineries on the Gulf coast. President Obama has refused to make a
decision on allowing the pipeline because he can’t decide whether to anger
construction unions or environmentalists.
The debate is largely symbolic because the State Department has said it
won’t cause any environmental damage or an increase in Left wing hysteria which
is already at the top of the scale, and besides much of the pipeline is already in place. Environmentalists who just don’t like all
that nasty, black sticky stuff, want to spray-paint slogans on that part of the
pipeline but the Canadians
who own it have cleverly hidden it underground. The new Congress in January
will probably pass a bill authorizing the remainder of the pipe line which will
be gridlocked by a presidential veto. A
Democrat bill to pay for spray-paint, metal detectors, and pipeline sniffing
Beagles for environmental groups will also probably be gridlocked.
So for fans of gridlock,
things look pretty good for the final two years of Obama’s White House golfing
vacation and if someone with three names and a closet full of pant suits would
happen to get elected president in 2016, gridlock could move to a whole new level.
No comments:
Post a Comment